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If he was a fast shooter then the concentration could be to help him last longer. My bf has to focus on literally anything else so he can last longer. It's very possible you're not the issue and you still feel just as good. Why not ask him about it, I'm sure his explanation is going to be reasonable and nothing negative towards your vagina. Calm down, you're overthinking. π
Stop doing oral then. If he wants to act like a child, and not kiss his wife after she pleases him, especially after she (assumingly) brushes her teeth, then he shouldn't get to have that done to him.
Online dating is the only way I can get laid. Very occasionally I have met a girl in real life and things have progressed but Iβm way to introverted and awkward in public to usually spark some sort of sexual connection with a women. Last year I binged tinder, bumble and hinge and managed to sleep with about 14 girls but the following four or so years before that I averaged like one or two a year at most from regular social interactions. Currently I am a depressed sack of shit with a possible autoimmune disease so sitting on 0 for the year π
You concerns are legitimate. Sounds like you just need to talk it out. It is okay for you to have limits on what you are, what are you aren't willing to do. It also sounds like some of your anxiety could be relieved by asking him basic questions The tail matching your hair could be a coincidence. Perhaps he doesn't think of you like an animal, perhaps its creates other feelings in him. You won't know until you ask And again compromise is okay. Maybe its hot for both of you, if you wear a plug, but no tail. Maybe its okay if you wear a non plug tail. Maybe it's okay if you only use a tail sometimes.