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He didn’t want a blowjob, but he wanted to jack off? I 100% understand and support that masturbating isn’t an insult to not wanting partnered sex, because sometimes you just want to orgasm and not have to worry about the other person or have it be a whole sex session. But she offered one sides free blowjob all day and he chose to watch porn and jerk off instead. I feel like that’s different. I’m a woman so idk but I’ve never met a man who enjoyed jerking himself off more than getting a blowjob from an enthusiastic partner. 🤷♀️
Don’t let him shut the conversation down, keep asking. „if it’s not me, what’s going on then?“. So you already had that talk. If he was open to a conversation then you would have had it right then and there. It’s always a possibility of simple mismatching :/
Not a ton that do which one specifically?
It could have been – but it could also have been him acknowledging that while he was scarred by what he saw, it is YOU who was betrayed which is the worse of the two transgressions. He was probably doing what a good partner would do any making sure you were OK while ignoring his own feelings (that selfless consideration is probably one of the many reasons you love him so much!) but now his feelings are showing themselves by his nerves being present during intimacy. It's all well and good him being the protector for you, but he also needs to know that he's safe being vulnerable with you about his own feelings. Speaking as a man, I can honestly say that I actually felt closer and more in love with my wife following a breakdown after a rather intense fight with my parents where she just held me and listened than many of the times we've been sexually intimate – something about being shown that I can be weak and need support and that that support is right in front of me when I need it is a feeling like no other in this world.
My view is that polyamorous/polygamy or even couple swaps don't really work. Like have you seen Sister Wives, if that doesn't say something i don't know what does, and the only reason they lasted is because most of the time they didn't live together. We are jealous and possessive, this behavior you can even see in dogs, especially of the things we are fond of or dare love, some don't even know it and have that feeling activate once they feel threatened by a third person. In fantasyland everything sounds fine but once you aren't horny anymore it may sound disturbing and I'm sure most would be upset that their partner f someone else, it creates friction and the feeling that you not might be special anymore. The only thing that differentiates a friend from a lover is intimacy and once that in the relationship is shared with someone else i can't understand how that would strengthen a bond rather, would make it more fragile but then again whatever rocks your boat, just my opinion.
It's called a Madonna-Whore complex when a man can either respect a woman or view her sexually, not both.
Clearly someone has never been eaten out in the shower.
Leave. That’s it.
The only accelerator is porn/erotica and I don't watch/read anymore unless desperate to get warmed up in time for date night. Combined with toys, the narrative becomes “I'm sorry, fiancé, but nothing about you and nothing you do turns me on” and I feel awful. I think this perspective of porn is kinda an unnecessary often harmful result from the porn is always terrible arguments that are becoming common. Yes porn can decrease interest in a partner but this doesn't necessarily have to be the case for porn anymore than for toys. Have you considered asking your partner if they'd like watching porn together? I watch porn fairly regularly but it has never decreased my interest in sex with my partner. I would actually love watching porn together but my partner isn't really interested in porn. Funny thing is she actually loves erotic movie scenes and gets turned on by them. So maybe if I find really passionate porn that emphasizes romance she would enjoy it.
I don't know.
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Might need to see a therapist to see what is behind this problem. Have you experienced sexual trauma in the past maybe? Rhetorical question because this is not the forum to address issues like that.