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This might also stem from your past. See, I don't know what you're dealing with, I wish I did, then I could offer more competent advice, but in general, nobody wants to get shamed. For example if I'm out and I notice that I made a mess on my shirt while eating, I'd rather run home and change than deal with the knowledge that people might see it for the rest of the day.
I think finishing is sometimes overrated. There’s so much pressure to cum and it interferes with actual intimacy and can diminish your pleasure. Can you have a night where you just touch each other and don’t have any pressure to cum? Like an erotic play date! Play around. Laugh. Moan. Lick each other. See what feels good.