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This man is made of red flags. I'd rather edge myself with sand paper than spend time in the company of the guy you've described here. No one in the world is hot enough to endure this kind of egomaniacal pathology. Get yourself some fresh trainers and run. Run from this man.
Iβm 19
If we are talking simple harm reduction, I think switching to a smooth textured vibrator or dildo may help with the bleeding. It may simply be your nails hurting you. Adding lube will help decrease your chance of injury. As for the guy, he couldn't hang. It sucks you lost a partner you were clearly super attracted to but he saw you in a negative way and took your libido as a flaw rather than a positive. Be with someone that loves your drive and is sexually compatible.