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1. I’m a social worker… for now I need to definitely stack some paper and find a way out.

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2. Not learning about my ADHD and its effects on my sexuality much sooner. The amount of pain this caused for my ex-spouse and me, and with some of My other partners, is regrettable. For the record, ADHD can cause a lot of issues with intimacy. If I get distracted, my brain decides that this new thing I’m focused on deserves all the attention—and the erection gets turned off. Sometimes never to return. Same thing can happen when my brain goes into problem solving mode. And then there’s occasionally spacing out during sex. It’s not quite dissociating but it is similar. Now I know to pause, slow down, cuddle, and return to my body. And then there’s what happens when an ADHD person is focused intently on something and gets interrupted. We can get grumpy. It’s not what we want, but it’s what happens. Startled. That can hurt my partner’s feelings and totally kill the mood. And then I wish we’d understood my spouse’s sexuality, their true gender, who they were oriented to. I wish I’d known that viagra and Cialis would be such lifesavers for adhd and sex. Now my body just works. It’s amazing. I cried when it happened. No more mystery erection dysfunction. I wish we could’ve given each other the intimacy we really wanted and needed. But because we didn’t fully know ourselves, we couldn’t fully sexually know each other. For women, ADHD can also interrupt the path to orgasm. And more. In general, ADHD and sexuality needs to be discussed much more frequently and frankly.

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